Topical Jokes #1

Let’s see how often I can update my blog with jokes about current events!

  • A San Francisco startup has invented a $30,000 machine that will make you a salad. For an additional $30, a San Francisco resident will toss it.
  • Kelly Ripa names Ryan Seacrest to succeed Michael Strahan as her co-host, proving that you can go back.
  • Kelly Ripa names Ryan Seacrest as her co-host, hoping to end rumors that Kelly Ripa is actually Ryan Seacrest in a wig and a dress.
  • The new Amazon Echo is equipped with a camera that allows Alexa to offer fashion advice. When you ask Alexa if a dress makes you look fat, you can set Alexa to either tell the truth, or make you feel good.. [Note. This might be a fun sketch].
         alt: When you ask Alexa if a dress makes you look fat, it self-destructs.
 
  • Attorneys charging a man with murdering his wife are using data from the wife’s Fitbit to challenge his story that an intruder killed her. While he awaits trial, the Fitbit is in witness protection at a Popeye’s chicken franchise.

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