IHOP is offering free pancakes in honor of National Pancake Day, or as it’s known at IHOP, ‘Please Seat Me As Far Away From That Smelly Hobo Getting Free Pancakes’ Day.

Australian police arrested several men after finding 650 pounds of ephedrine – a key crystal meth ingredient – in highlighter markers.  Police arrested the smugglers after they told officers they needed the highlighters for a big “meth..uh, I mean math” test.

President Trump received harsh criticism for his assertion that he would have run in to the Parkland school shooting even if he didn’t have a weapon. Trump’s close allies doubt the President’s assertion, owing to a) the shooting happened on a Wednesday, not Taco Tuesday; and b) the cafeteria had closed for the day.

Apple is planning to open “AC Wellness” – in-house medical clinics for its employees. The move comes after multiple employee deaths from misdiagnoses and failed surgeries at the Genius Bar.

Disney is donating $1 Million in profits from ‘Black Panther’ to the Boys & Girls Clubs of America. Boys & Girls Clubs execs are planning to spend some of the money to send children on trips to Wakanda.

Liquor giant Diageo is issuing a Special Edition of its Johnnie Walker Black Label whiskey with a female logo, ‘Jane Walker’. The logo is unique in that once Jane fills up with scotch, her clothes come off.

Starting in April, the state of California will allow companies testing driverless cars to do so without a human riding in the car as backup. They will, however, require the autonomous car’s driver’s seat to be occupied by a mannequin of an 80-year-old in wraparound sunglasses so that there’s something for real people to yell at and flip off.

File sharing company Dropbox filed for an initial public offering; they sent a Dropbox link to the SEC and prospective investment bankers, most of whom replied “it’s not working”.

Netflix is premiering “Jinn”, its first original series in Arabic; it tells the story of teenagers who discover a genie and fight Middle Eastern stereotypes.

White House Communications Director Hope Hicks will meet on Tuesday with the House Intelligence Committee on Russian election interference. She’s expected to face tough questioning like “Did you ever hear anyone communicating with Russians?” from Democrats; and “What designer are you wearing?” from Republicans.