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California Governor Gavin Newsom is threatening Florida Governor Ron Desantis with kidnapping & human trafficking charges after illegal immigrants were flown from Florida to Sacramento. Worse, the state of Florida took the immigrants cash for aisle seats and checked baggage fees.

Federal gun charges were filed against the mother of a 6-year-old who shot his teacher in Newport News, Virginia. The good news is, she’s now officially off-the-hook for Snack Mom duty.

Drug maker Merck is suing the U.S. government over their requirement that prescription drug prices be lowered for seniors on Medicare. Merck said the penalties are unfair, and that lowering the price of boner pills for horny old men in retirement communities will bankrupt them in a month.

Apple officially announced its $3,499 Vision Pro virtual reality headset. Apple’s CEO said they’re working on vr content to be offered via Apple TV+, and Apple XXX.

Disney’s ‘The Little Mermaid‘ bombed at the box office in China & South Korea, over what may be race-based backlash from casting a black actress as Ariel. Disney has bigger hopes in Asian markets for its other summer release, ‘The Little iPhone Factory Worker’.

The PGA Tour announced a surprise merger with the Saudi Arabian-backed LIV Golf Tour. The newly-merged pro golf league will kick off in the Middle East with the inaugural We Ordered The Murder Of Journalist Jamal Khashoggi Open.

A Harvard researcher developed a vaccine to curb feral cat populations by preventing ovulation in females. He got the idea after becoming frustrated getting feral cats to use condoms and take birth control pills.

State police in Michigan pursued a 10-year-old boy driving a stolen car. The 10-year-old carjacked the vehicle from the 12-year-old who stole it before him.

Viral video shows a man trying to retrieve a foul ball at a college baseball game trip, causing the child he was holding to smash their head on the ground. He was charged with an error, and the fielder’s choice of telling his wife the truth or lying about it.

A group of 685 people at a Malaysia shopping mall broke a record for the largest gathering of people dressed as Spider Man. The record was certified by a Guinness Book of Records adjudicator who’s apparently never been to San Diego ComicCon.

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President Trump warned of a rush to judgment regarding the disappearance of journalist Jamal Khashoggi, who vanished after entering the Saudi Consulate in Istanbul. Critics say Trump is giving room for the Saudis to deny involvement, and a chance to give Trump tips on how to make reporters disappear.

Trump also posted a gloating tweet after Stormy Daniels’ defamation lawsuit against him was dismissed, calling her “horseface”. A self-satisfied Trump then spent an hour applying bronzer and a second hour fixing his combover.

No winners were declared in the record Mega Millions lottery, swelling the current jackpot to $868 million — and keeping revenge fantasies alive for at least two more days.

Roseanne Barr’s character on series reboot The Conners was killed off by a opioid overdose.  The fictitious death was confirmed by an autopsy, because apparently lower-middle-class nobodies get full-blown autopsies in the impoverished Midwest town where The Conners live.

Research published in medical journal PLOS Medicine suggests that people who consume large quantities of dairy fat like cheese lessen their risk of developing Type 2 diabetes — mainly because heart disease kills them before they have a chance.

North Carolina resident Jimmy Shue said that he gave his first name to a Wendy’s employee to confirm his order, but when he picked it up, the name ‘Chubby’ was written on it. Shue says he was targeted because of his weight, but a Wendy’s spokesperson said that’s the default name they put on everyone’s receipts.

Canada ended an almost-hundred-year ban on marijuana as the country legalized and regulated its sale for recreational use.  So far, the top-selling flavor is plain, followed by maple.

In Illinois, Dr. Constantino Perales was sentenced to 12 years in prison after being found guilty of giving oxycodone and Xanax prescriptions in exchange for sex. Dr Perales is expected to work in the prison infirmary, exchanging drugs for much less appealing sex.

A neuroscience professor at Emory University using MRI scans said he has proven that dogs are capable of understanding the words that humans say to them. He theorizes that cats understand human words too, they just don’t care.

Melania Trump visits Philly today for an appearance at Thomas Jefferson University Hospital to promote a new offshoot of her Be Best campaign, called Not For Nothin Youse Should, Like, Be Best — Y’Know?