The bald eagle population in the state of New Jersey has doubled in the last 10 years according to the New Jersey Bald Eagle Project, and evidenced by New Jersey eagles’ increased demand for toupees, deep v-neck t-shirts and gold chains.
Federal law enforcement broke up a fraudulent nursing diploma ring, which issued over 7,600 phony credentials to nurses. The big break in the case came when hundreds of nurses didn’t know how to properly measure height & weight of patients.
A Florida man broke into a Joe’s Crab Shack in Ft. Myers, stole items and defecated on the dining room floor. Cops examining the evidence would only say it appears he’d eaten at Joe’s Crab Shack within the last eight hours.
The FDA plans to make it easier for gay and bisexual men to donate blood – they’ll allow the Red Cross Bloodmobile to park at Lady Gaga concerts.
A McDonald’s corporate president who made $7.4 million in compensation said that pending California legislation to pay fast-food workers $22/hour will “destroy jobs”. On his next trip to the drive-thru, his Big Mac broke the record for “most saliva”.
Kim Kardashian reportedly advised Paris Hilton on surrogacy issues prior to Hilton and her husband welcoming their new baby. Kim also advised Hilton on how babies are born, which led to Hilton’s surrogacy decision.
Melissa Williams, 46, was fired from the Arapahoe County, Colorado police after her “filthy MILF” OnlyFans account was discovered. However, she now earns $27,000/month for going from Arapahoe to Videohoe.
Several women posted TikTok videos saying that they didn’t know their upside-down pineapple tattoos were widely-used symbols indicating they were sexual “swingers”. Some are now getting cover-up tattoos of pineapple upside-down cakes.
A new 16-court indoor Pickleball center is opening in the Philadelphia suburbs. It’s the first of its kind in that it’s the first Pickleball facility needing bouncers.
An arcade worker claims to be able to consistently beat the ‘claw machine’ to win stuffed animals with her ‘double tap’ method. She double-taps the claw button after it descends, and if that doesn’t work, she double-taps the glass with a claw hammer.