Wednesday Jokes: June 30th

A golfer at Tom Brady’s country club found one of his personalized golf balls, a Titleist labeled with the number 12 and his seven Super Bowl wins. The guy who found it said it felt underinflated.

Southwest Airlines is being criticized for canceling 600 flights and delaying 4,000 others over the last weekend. A spokesperson said the disruption was caused by severe thunderstorm activity, and flight attendants running out of dad jokes.

IKEA introduced a line of LGBTQ+ themed sofas, where gay, trans, and non-binary couples can sit to work things out after brawling about assembling the other furniture.

Justin Bieber asked fans to stop staking out the entrance to his New York apartment. They complied, and were replaced by a different group of fans staking out his New York apartment.

Khloe Kardashian turned 37, and shared a rare photo of her brother, Rob Kardashian. Khloe is believed to be the only photographer who wants a picture of Rob Kardashian.

‘Wonder Woman’ Gal Gadot gave birth to her third child, and was granted three months’ maternity leave by the Super Friends.

TLC Network canceled the Duggar Family reality show, ‘Counting On’, after Josh Duggar’s arrest for child pornography. Pending his trial and sentencing, TLC may give him a new show, ’19 Prison Beatdowns & Counting’.

Kataluna Enriquez became the first transgender woman and first transgender woman of color to win the Miss Nevada USA pageant. “What?!” said her boyfriend.

In the wake of Las Vegas Raiders Carl Nassib coming out, the NFL released a new video proclaiming “football is gay” – a sentiment echoed by a high-school athlete who learned he was cut from the varsity team.

Actress Allison Mack will be sentenced today for her role in the NXIVM sex cult. Mack apologized for the physical and mental harm she caused, adding that it’s been especially damaging to her personal brand.

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