Researchers at University of California developed a reusable ice cube that lasts 13 hours without melting or growing mold – great news for blackout alcoholics who like to wake up with their drink still cold.

One of Jeffrey Epstein’s butlers testified at Ghislaine Maxwell’s trial that one of his duties was to clean a two-headed dildo used in Epstein’s massage room and return it to Maxwell’s bathroom. He also testified of the many uses of Dawn dish detergent.

A rare all-white sperm whale was spotted in the Caribbean, acting like it was better than the more common gray and black sperm whales.

HBO executives worried that The Sopranos actor James Gandolfini was going to die because of his alcohol and drug binges. Gandolfini finished the series, but was eventually whacked by his own heart.

Governor Ron Desantis is proposing a 200-person paramilitary force that reports to him, with no federal accountability. However, they may not garner much respect since he wants to name them the ‘Florida Men’.

A Florida bride passed out and vomited from dehydration during her wedding ceremony, then her infant nephew defecated on her dress at the reception. The story was the featured event on the Society Page of the Daytona Beach News-Journal.

Drug lord Juan ‘El Chapo’ Guzman’s wife, Emma Coronel Aispuro, was sentenced to 36 months in a California prison for her role in drug cartel activity. She begged the judge for leniency, saying it will take her 10-year-old twin daughters at least a year to build a tunnel to visit her.

A Houston woman claims she’s pregnant with NBA star – and Khloe Kardashian’s baby-daddy – Tristan Thompson’s child, after Thompson spent too much time in the shooting lane.

President Biden’s new COVID-19 policies allow for free at-home testing. Trump supporters are already complaining of false negative results after urinating on the test swabs.

Malls and event planners are encountering a nationwide shortage of Santas this holiday season. “Of COURSE you are, there’s only one, you dipsh*ts!” said a 6-year-old economist.