Tuesday Jokes: April 13th

Domino’s is now delivering pizza using driverless vehicles. It’s great news for cheapskate losers who don’t want to tip a human driver, but still bad news for anyone having to eat the Domino’s Pizza.

After original panelist Sharon Osbourne left after defending racist remarks by Piers Morgan, ‘The Talk’ returned Monday with what they called “one of their most difficult discussions ever” – whether you’re Team Angelina or Team Brad in their divorce.

The CDC reports 187 million doses of COVID-19 vaccine have been administered, while warning of an impending shortage of both Johnson & Johnson vaccines, and Captain America Band-Aids.

After another school shooting in Knoxville, Tennessee, administrators closed the school for two days. They advised students to use the free time to pick out body armor and guns for the prom.

Singing star Usher was slammed for reportedly using fake money with his name and face on it at a Las Vegas strip club. He said he only used the fake bills to tip dancers with fake breasts.

The FCC is launching its own Internet speed-test app, in response to Comcast customers who say the company’s speed-test app is just a picture with the word FAST! on it.

A ‘Real Housewives of Nashville’ show is reportedly in the works, featuring female country music performers and wives of others. However, a competing show, ‘Real Dogs, Trucks & Guns of Nashville’ tested better with viewers.

Bianca Belair dethroned reigning champion Sasha Banks at Wrestlemania to claim the WWE title belt, in the first-ever championship wrestling match featuring two black women that wasn’t a Worldstarhiphop video shot in a McDonald’s.

Macaulay Culkin and partner Brenda Song welcomed their first child, son Dakota. Their baby gift registry includes Micro Machines, paint, a blow torch and a rifle.

More than 100,000 viewers have complained to the BBC about their coverage of the late Prince Philip, saying the broadcaster should find pictures and video where you can’t see his teeth.

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