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Doctors are reporting an increase in women with serious infections from using press-on nails. They say if they don’t stop using them they’ll eventually have to switch to press-on fingers.

Dubai experienced record rainfall and flooding. First responders used lifeboats to rescue hundreds of residents stranded in cars & on camels.

Planet Fitness has a new CEO, Colleen Keating. She plans on showing up for three days straight then never again..

Researchers found some species of bees can survive underwater for up to a week. They’re called Scoo-bees.

Airlines say they’re expecting a record summer of travel. They also forecast high demand for first class and – in the case of Spirit & Frontier – no class.

The WNBA commissioner said superstar Caitlin Clark’s $360,000 total salary for her first four years in the league is a “false narrative”. She added that low pay for non-starters and lesser-known WNBA players is a “true narrative”.

Over a dozen members of the Kennedy family endorsed Joe Biden for President instead of their blood relative, independent Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. In a statement RFK Jr. said he can’t believe they’d assassinate a Kennedy….. ‘s character.

A British comedian, Samantha Hannah, set a goal of finding a husband in a year. She found a man who eventually proposed, even though Samantha said she could only do about a half-hour.

12 jurors have been seated in Donald Trump’s New York hush money trial, although the trial can’t proceed until they find 6 alternates, who could replace primary jurors once they admit that they, too, had sex with Stormy Daniels.

A Maryland high school student was arrested after authoring a 129-page plan for a school shooting. They’re also interrogating the English teacher who told him he really needed to edit it down to 100 pages.

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For the first time ever, a Lifetime Christmas movie – ‘A Cowboy Christmas Romance‘ – features a sex scene. Copyright issues forced producers to switch out the film’s original title: ‘Brokeback Santa’s Workshop’.

Pope Francis canceled a planned trip to Dubai to attend a climate change conference because he’s still recovering from the flu – and not at all because his travel partner told him at the last minute that homosexuality is illegal in the United Arab Emirates.

A Virgin Atlantic Boeing 787 became the first jet to cross the Atlantic Ocean using sustainable, non-fossil fuel. Meanwhile, a Spirit Airlines Boeing 727 manufactured in 1963 became the first jet to barely make it from Chicago to Los Angeles on a quarter-tank of gas.

Kraft introduced vegan Mac & Cheese – just when you thought toddlers couldn’t possibly be even pickier douchebags.

Red Lobster said they recorded an $11 million quarterly loss on their Endless Shrimp promotion. Although final numbers aren’t yet available because a few hundred families that started over the summer are still going.

Golden Bachelor Gerry Turner’s alleged ex-girlfriend said he lied to ABC producers about their 3-year relationship after his wife died, and that he refused to take her to his high-school reunion because she gained weight. He ended their relationship by refusing to give her a rose. Or a text back. Or orgasms.

UK’s Metro Bank announced it was cutting 20% of its workers just weeks before Christmas. Metro Bank’s Board of Directors and CEO were then informed they’d each be visited by Three Spirits on Christmas Eve.

Trolls are accusing Beyonce of whitening her skin. Trolls are leaving Taylor Swift alone, because she couldn’t get any whiter if she tried.

Barry Manilow performed at the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree Lighting, and was criticized for his appearance by viewers who said he used too much Botox. Manilow clapped back, singing he can’t smile without it.

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Egypt paraded 22 mummies through the streets of Cairo as they moved between museums. The parade took 12 hours since the mummies were really dragging their feet.

A double-mutant COVID-19 strain emerged in California. It’s believed to have originated when Wolverine made out with Storm on the set of Maskless X-Men.

Republicans are railing against the idea of COVID-19 ‘vaccine passports’ – mainly because they’re older and not crazy about their passport photos.

Dubai police made multiple arrests after nude women were photographed on the balcony of an apartment building, in violation of public decency laws. They face fines and prison terms, while the property manager faces a tenfold increase in guys wanting to rent apartments there.

A Tulsa, Oklahoma man was arrested for stalking a female coworker by leaving candy & food on her doorstep, then shooting her husband when they emerged from their home. He remains in jail, while the raccoons that ate the candy and food try to bail him out.

A magnitude 4.0 earthquake struck the Los Angeles area at around 4a.m. Monday, hoping to get the jump on traffic.

Cher apologized for a Tweet speculating if she were present at the murder of George Floyd, she could have helped. It started “if i could turn back tiiiiime..”

New Mexico has already administered COVID-19 vaccines to over 50% of residents. Local health officials credit both the efficiency of their plan, and New Mexico not offering much other interesting shit to do.

Katy Perry said she’s quit shaving her legs since becoming a Mom, describing herself as “fine, fresh, fierce ..and furry”.

Lizzo shared multiple photos on Instagram wearing a form-fitting purple dress with a lower-back cutout that exposed her butt crack. She had it made so she had somewhere to put her microphone while she’s clapping on stage.