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Buffalo Wild Wings opened its 100th takeout & delivery ‘Go’ location, and says one-third of its sales are made outside of sit-down restaurants. Now 33% of customers say “this food sucks” to themselves in living rooms instead of to BWW servers.

Golden Bachelor Gerry Turner, 72 and wife Theresa Nist, 70 are ending their marriage after just three months. It’s the Early Bird Special Divorce.

All of O.J. Simpson’s children visited him before he died, but they were not allowed to have their cell phones with them, and were required to sign non-disclosure agreements. O.J. then confessed that Hertz wasn’t the best rental car agency.

Apple upgraded its AirTag functionality to allow sharing of the tracking devices with up to five people. Now you can enlist friends to help you stalk your ex-spouse or partner.

Vietnam real estate tycoon Truong My Lan was sentenced to death after she defrauded the nation’s banks out of $12.5 billion, or 304 trillion dong. Residents said they could only dream of seeing that many dongs.

Earlier this week, the terms ‘eclipse’; ‘total eclipse’; and ‘eclipse sex’ were the top 3 searches on Pornhub. For those curious, eclipse sex is intercourse with a partner so big you can’t see one of them.

Viral video shows an exchange at a Florida airport with a Spirit Airlines employee saying “F**k you, too!” while reviewing a woman’s boarding pass. A spokesperson for Spirit Airlines explained this is the official greeting for Spirit’s frequent flyers.

Errors were corrected to the base of a statue honoring the late Kobe Bryant, including some statistics in the engraved box score of Bryant’s 81-point game, and a statement claiming he never sexually assaulted anyone.

A grease fire in the kitchen of The Tamron Hall Show forced the evacuation of her studio, and The View, which films in an adjacent studio. The fire was extinguished without incident, and Whoopi Goldberg and Joy Behar fought over who got the french fries.

17 countries were ranked in terms of the size of women’s buttocks, with South Africa having the biggest, India the smallest, and the U.S. ranked 6th. Curiously, Brazil was omitted, because the researchers just wanted to give other countries a chance.

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HGTV’s Christina Anstead changed her Instagram profile to her maiden name, Haack, following her divorce from Ant Anstead. She also hired an exterminator to get rid of Ant’s things.

Paris Hilton said she’s begun in vitro fertilization in the hope of having twins. She said the hardest part is how cold the eggs are after she takes them out of her refrigerator.

Tuesday marked the one-year anniversary of Kobe Bryant’s death. He spent the day trashing other deceased NBA players who won’t pass him the ball.

Tyler Perry received the COVID-19 vaccine, just in time for Friday’s release of his new film: ‘Tyler Perry’s Tyler Perry Gets The COVID-19 Vaccine‘.

Trans actor Elliot Page and dancer wife Emma Portner are divorcing, following three years of marriage and arguing about who wears the pants in their family.

China is rolling out COVID testing using anal swabs, saying results are more accurate. However, getting volunteers to work the test sites has gotten tougher.

Florida’s ‘Paramedic Of The Year’ was arrested for forging COVID vaccine documents and attempting to steal doses. His Paramedic Of The Year award was in recognition of getting the most phone numbers from alcohol poisoned girls during Spring Break.

Democratic and Republican Senators reached a power-sharing agreement after discussions of preserving the filibuster. Donald Trump had supported keeping the filibuster, mainly because he thought it was a four-patty Big Mac.

Research indicates using profanity helps pain tolerance. The study followed women talking to their spouses and doctors during childbirth.

Joe Biden announced the purchase of 200 million more doses of COVID vaccines. Government watchdogs condemned the purchase, saying it fell well below the 250 million threshold to qualify for free shipping.

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U.S. Customs in Minnesota seized almost $1 million in counterfeit one-dollar bills in a shipment from China. Later that day, Minneapolis police arrested a Chinese guy who had been in a strip club for 10 straight hours. 

A Florida daycare worker was fired after sending a child home with “Mom, I’m out of diapers” written on his chest & stomach in marker. She then flipped the child over and saw “and would it kill you to send some snacks for the workers?” on his back. 

Mattel is releasing “its most diverse Barbie dolls yet”, that are bald, have skin conditions, prosthetic limbs and wheelchairs. They’re only sold in packages of two so they have someone to play with. 

The written ‘Question & Answer’ portion of the Trump Impeachment Trial commences Wednesday afternoon. So far the top questions are “Can we speed this up?’ and ‘What’s for lunch?’

Jakila Taylor, an 18-year-old Florida woman, was arrested at her high school and charged with luring a man to a robbery after meeting him on Plenty of Fish. Taylor was also stripped of her presidency of the Young Entrepreneurs club. 

Louis C.K. performed a surprise set at a benefit show in New York and was greeted with a standing ovation. He then asked the women in the audience if it was okay that he, too, get visibly excited. 

A Tokyo company has been ordered to pay Nintendo $450,000 for operating an unlicensed service where tourists drive Mario Kart-like karts in game character costumes on city streets. They also face multi-million dollar lawsuits from drivers injured after spinning out on turtle shells and banana peels. 

Billy Joel’s Long Island home was burglarized over the weekend. 12 of his classic motorcycles were damaged, and his liquor cabinet was emptied into a 40-foot cargo container. 

WWE wrestlers Nikki and Brie Bella are both pregnant, with due dates less than two weeks apart. Although they may choose to induce delivery on the same day via body slams. 

Unscrupulous sellers are already attempting to capitalize on the death of Kobe Bryant by selling counterfeit Kobe memorabilia. Experts say shoes and jerseys are the hardest fakes to spot; hockey sticks are the easiest.