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Mattel introduced the first Barbie doll representing a woman with Down Syndrome. She comes with a few standard accessories, but nobody’s giving her the keys to her pink Dream Car anytime soon.

Kim Kardashian said she’s taking the California bar exam again and would happily trade reality tv for a job as a full-time lawyer – since she’s been successfully getting guys off for over twenty years.

California officials arrested Dr. Stephen Gevorkian on multiple counts of practicing medicine without a license. Gevorkian said he treated some patients, but mostly met people confused by his name wanting to commit suicide.

A Philadelphia woman was found guilty of drugging her Tinder date after meeting him at a suburban hotel. She swiped right, his wallet, and car.

Washington state passed legislation banning the sale of AR-15s and other assault weapons. Republicans plan to shoot it down.

Convicted Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes, who begins her 11-year prison sentence tomorrow, reportedly named her newborn daughter Invicta, from the Greek meaning “unconquered”. She chose it because there isn’t a Greek translation for “wire fraud”.

A Harvard-schooled etiquette expert advises a three-word response when someone says something mean to you: “are you okay?”. Meanwhile, a community college-schooled expert advises a different three word response, beginning with “go” and ending with “yourself”.

Joe Biden welcomed South Korean president Yoon Seuk Yeol to the White House, but raised eyebrows when greeting him “Hey! Yoo Suk!”

New York City announced an eight-year plan to renovate the Port Authority bus terminal, with the first three years dedicated to removing homeless people.

A man arranged for his life savings to be used to pay college tuition for 33 high school graduates in Iowa. He just needs to find 23 more high school graduates in Iowa.

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Kane Tanaka, the world’s oldest living person, turned 119 on Sunday in Fukuoka, Japan. She is also the oldest living person who’s never received a Starbucks gift card for her birthday.

OJ Simpson posted a video to social media, calling Tampa Bay Buccaneers wide receiver Antonio Brown quitting mid-game “unacceptable”. Simpson also called Brown’s history of alleged domestic abuse “acceptable”.

New England Patriots Head Coach Bill Belichick also addressed the Antonio Brown story, saying his team has a a specific process in place for players with mental health issues, known as the waiver process.

A winter storm stranded motorists for 18 hours on I-95 in Virginia between Richmond and Washington, DC – adding 25 minutes to their usual commute.

A man on his deathbed in suburban Boston confessed to his family that he was a fugitive robber who’d stolen $215,000 from a Cleveland bank in 1969. He died peacefully, happy he never had to return to Cleveland.

NBA star Tristan Thompson confirmed he fathered a baby with another woman while in a relationship with Khloe Kardashian. Thompson wrote to Kardashian “you don’t deserve this” – meaning either his betrayal, or his sperm.

Disgraced Theranos CEO Elizabeth Holmes was found guilty on four counts of defrauding investors in her blood-testing startup. While awaiting sentincing, she plans to spend time changing her blood testing machines that don’t work into COVID testing machines that don’t work.

The National Hockey League postponed its 92nd game this season, leading to a spike in ratings for TV networks that would otherwise be showing hockey games.

Novak Djokovic will defend his Australian Open tennis title despite being unvaccinated, after being granted a waiver by a panel of independent medical professionals who bet a lot of money on Novak Djokovic winning the Australian Open.

A golfer in Australia had his driver snapped after a giant robber crab attacked his clubs. The golfer triple-bogeyed the next hole and asked the crab to break his putter too.