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BTS singer Jung Kook performed his single ‘Standing Next To You’ on The Tonight Show. For those unfamiliar with Korean boy band BTS, Jung Kook translates to ‘Harry Styles’ in English. .

Journalists in attendance for Donald Trump’s testimony at his New York financial fraud trial stated that Trump “lost it” on the witness stand – criticizing the judge, the attorney general, and whoever brought in Wendy’s instead of McDonald’s for lunch.

Actress Megan Fox released a book of poems entitled ‘Pretty Boys Are Poisonous‘. Titles of the poems include ‘“rape,” “funerals are for lovers,” “why i wish i was gay,” and “to marry an arsonist”. In other news Megan Fox’s read-along at the Children’s Library of Los Angeles has been postponed.

Lindsay Lohan, Lacey Chabert & Amanda Seyfried reprised their ‘Mean Girls‘ roles in a new ad campaign for Walmart’s Black Friday sales. Suburban moms get their own chance to be Mean Girls as they trample other women when stores open at 5 a.m. on November 24th.

Deanes EIPIC, a Michelin-starred restaurant in Belfast, Northern Ireland, closed due to rising operating costs, higher menu prices, and customers refusal to order anything but corned beef & cabbage.

Packs of javelinas – pig-like creatures with sharp teeth – are destroying Arizona’s Seven Canyons golf course as they tear up fairways looking for food. It’s illegal to kill javelinas in Arizona, so groundskeepers can only hope they leave, or choke to death on Titleists.

Baskin-Robbins introduced ‘Turkey Day Fixins’ ice cream as its Flavor of the Month. It has no turkey flavoring, but features notes of honey cornbread, cranberrry & sweet potato. After poor consumer testing, Dairy Queen cancelled its Green Bean Casserole Blizzard.

The Crazy Horse 3 strip club in Las Vegas is offering one free lap dance to current & former military personnel on Veterans Day. Extra dancers are being brought in to grind on Privates, Sergeants, etc.

A viral video shows a commercial jet flying over Israel while, in nearby airspace, Israeli’s Iron Dome defense missiles exploded Hamas rockets. Passengers aboard Spirit Airlines new service to Tel Aviv were each charged $10 for the light show.

Pauly Shore proposed to Drew Barrymore on Friday’s episode of The Drew Barrymore Show. The proposal question was unanswered – but at least we know if Barrymore could still attract A-List stars to the show after her Writers Strike controversy.

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Pokemon Go will get ‘reality blending’ updates in June, where Pokemon can hide behind real life objects, and mug you to free the other Pokemon you’ve already captured.

Hertz Rental Car filed for bankruptcy. They blame low usage during the pandemic, and the inability to charge $6 for a gallon of gas.

A researcher in Japan created a lickable surface that can recreate almost any flavor without eating the associated food. It’s thought to be a game-changing breakthrough for both weight loss and oral sex.

NASA is scheduled to launch two American astronauts into space in a Tesla Falcon 9 rocket on Wednesday. They’re expected to arrive at the International Space Station after they circle the Earth a couple of times on the way looking for a recharging station.

Twitter labeled two of Donald Trump’s tweets “Potentially Misleading” in accordance with their new fact-checking policy. Twitter may skip reviewing individual tweets and just label Trump’s account “Totally Misleading”.

Chrissy Teigen told her 29 million Instagram followers that she’s getting her breast implants removed. She received over a million comments from creeps asking if they could have them.

Dairy Queen unveiled a vegan Dilly Bar — it’s non-dairy chocolate covering three brussels sprouts on a stick.

Ford created software for police cars that heat the interior to 133 degrees for 15 minutes to kill disease-causing germs. Cops can hit the switch, go sit in Dunkin Donuts for a while, then return to a disinfected car and a more cooperative perp in the backseat.

A judge refused to immediately accept Lori Loughlin’s guilty plea and prison term in the college admissions scandal, choosing instead to render his decision at a Very Special Sentencing Episode on August 21st.

City of Philadelphia officials are moving 50 to 100 homeless people from an unused baggage claim area at Philadelphia International Airport during the pandemic. The people will be bused to various locations, but somehow their bags ended up in Miami.