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A Southwest Airlines flight attendant suffered a broken back after a hard landing on a flight to California. She fell off the sink while in the lavatory with a copilot.

A police lieutenant in a Philadelphia suburb is accused of providing answers for an oral exam to a prospective police cadet. The lieutenant denies it, and adds the answers aren’t hard, including “shoot the guy”; “where’s my bribe?” and “jelly donuts”.

The Wall Street Journal reports that the FBI raid on Mar-a-Lago was prompted by a confidential informant, known only as Deep Slovenian Throat.

Disney+ is raising its monthly rates for ad-free content, despite an injunction filed to halt it from She-Hulk Attorney At Law.

Major League Baseball – whose rules prohibit in-game use of electronics – is investigating Pittsburgh Pirates second baseman Rodolfo Castro, whose cellphone fell out of his pocket as he slid into third base. The Tinder match on Castro’s screen also asked when he’d be sliding into third base.

Kevin Federline said his two sons with Britney Spears are choosing not to spend time with her because of her steady stream of nude Instagram photos. They prefer to stay with Federline, confident that they, along with everyone else, will never see him nude.

After 10 years off store shelves, General Mills is reintroducing Count Chocula, Frankenberry & Boo Berry – the Monsters Of Childhood Obesity.

Moderna’s CEO said he expects their COVID vaccine to evolve “like an iPhone”. Meaning old people will get a new one every six years.

Marguerite Koller, 99, of Blue Bell, Pennsylvania recently celebrated the arrival of her 100th great-grandchild. Unfortunately, Koller’s right hand is now paralyzed from writing so many five-dollar checks for birthday cards.

Investigators determined a foul stench in Paulsboro, New Jersey was from a truck releasing fumes from a fuel additive. They can now turn their attention to the foul stench of sunbathers along the Jersey Shore.

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A teen boy in Buffalo, NY received a Ford Mustang convertible as a reward for independently cleaning up his street after riots and protests. He hopped in the car and left Buffalo.

Thousands of New York City businesses are reopening after pandemic lockdown, forcing tens of thousands of residents to decide if they want to give up the sweet parking spot they’ve had for 10 weeks.

Minneapolis City Council voted to defund its police force. They’ve already begun recruiting new citizen patrols by offering Free Parkas.

The White House is considering a Trump speech to the nation on race and unity. White House insiders describe the proposed speech as “really short”.

According to an NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll, four out of five voters think the United States is “out of control”. One in five voters think racial division, rampant disease & record unemployment are “pretty cool”.

CrossFit CEO Greg Glassman tweeted “it’s Floyd-19” in response to a tweet about racism being a public health issue. In response, high-profile CrossFit athletes severed ties with the organization and will find other ways to tear their ligaments.

Wichita State nixed Ivanka Trump’s virtual commencement speech. She then tweeted in condemnation of ‘cancel culture’, but still expressed thanks for not actually having to go to Wichita.

Microsoft is giving its Edge web browser to everyone updating Windows 10. Edge has new features like the ability to hide notification prompts, so you won’t be annoyed when your computer tries telling you your personal information is being stolen.

Following a May health scare, friends of Ryan Seacrest worry that he’s “overdoing it” – a concern echoed by everyone watching tv who’s sick of seeing Ryan Seacrest.

Monthly sales of Tesla Model 3 vehicles tripled in China – as pandemic lockdowns ended, and as Chinese drivers crashed Model 3s into each other and had to buy new ones.

An Apple Watch called police in Chandler, Arizona after its wearer fainted and remained unconscious. Paramedics arrived and the watch directed them to the nearest Apple Store for a new watch.

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Two-time Indy 500 winner Al Unser Jr. was arrested for driving while intoxicated. He was arrested after making a pit stop in a Burger King drive thru and yelling about how long it was taking to get four fresh tires.

The FCC approved a $26 Billion merger between T-Mobile and Sprint. The two company CEOs attempted to speak by phone, but the call dropped after 15 seconds.

Little Caesars is partnering with Impossible Foods on a pizza topped with plant-based sausage. The meatless sausage would become the fifth-weirdest ingredient in a $5 Little Caesars pizza.

Fans took to social media to complain about the series finale of HBO’s ‘Game Of Thrones’, some vowing never to use their friend’s HBO Go password again for at least another week.

A Wall St Journal study claims Millennials are nearing middle age in worse financial shape than every living generation that preceded them, despite having record-high levels of education. So, they’re smart enough to know how poor they are.

President Trump lashed out on Twitter after the New York Times reported Deutsche Bank had flagged transactions linked to him & Jared Kushner for money laundering. Trump said he didn’t need banks, and had never been to a money laundry in his life.

Billionaire Robert Smith, honorary degree recipient at Morehouse College, said in his commencement speech that he’s using $40 million to retire the student loans of all 2019 graduates.  Strayer University said Queen Latifah will not be doing so for graduates watching the speech she was Photoshopped into.

Facebook is experimenting with robotics, including leveraging “curiosity” to help robots learn faster via artificial intelligence. To demonstrate, one robot vaguebooked “..what a day..” and another robot asked “Hope you’re okay!”

Users of the new Google Pixel 3a budget phone are reporting that it shuts itself off once a day without warning. Google said they’re unaware of the problem, but advised affected users to try giving the phone something interesting to do.

Ford is laying off 2,000 headquarters employees, in news that the CEO described as Ford Tough.