Philadelphia is ending its indoor mask mandate less than a week after reinstating it, after the Centers for Disease Control determined the health benefits of wearing one didn’t outweigh the risks from the food Philly residents ate when they removed it.

Tiger Woods introduced two new 18-hole putting courses at a fun center in Sarasota. He focused on putting courses because he’s notoriously great at putting, and because it leaves more time for participants to hit on the female bartenders.

Mike Tyson repeatedly punched a passenger seated behind him on a Jet Blue flight, but walked off the aircraft before it departed. He then boarded a Spirit Airlines flight, and waited for the captain to illuminate the fistfight sign before pummeling a different guy.

A new mom’s Tik Tok video claims the key to understanding a newborn baby is deciphering nine unique baby cries – three each for hunger, fatigue, and filling their diaper.

The FAA revoked the private pilot’s license of YouTube’r Trevor Jacob, saying he crashed a small plane on purpose, jumping out with a parachute and recording it all on a smartphone with a selfie stick. Jacob remains grounded for a year, and then will start work flying for Spirit Airlines.

Amber Heard is accused of copying ex-husband Johnny Depp’s outfits as the two square off in court over a lawsuit. Heard said it was tough to find a Halloween Spirit store open in April to get a Captain Jack Sparrow costume.

Florida released four examples of math textbooks it disqualified for use in the state. The exhibits showed bar charts measuring perceived racism – with the tall bar labeled ‘Florida’.

Donald Trump mocked the shutdown of CNN+ streaming service after just three weeks. He released a statement calling it an ’empty desert’. The statement was released on multiple online outlets, including to the six people on Truth Social.

Victoria’s Secret named its first male Brand Ambassador, actor Darren Barnet. He’ll model gender-neutral apparel and give online tutorials on one-handed bra unhooking.

Kevin Federline’s lawyer said Britney Spears’ recent post about his not wanting to see her when she was pregnant with their children is false, and that he would vigorously defend Federline just as soon as Britney paid him.

Caitlyn Parker, 29, wed 41-year-old radio star and American Idol mentor Bobby Bones, then jumped them later that night.

Right-wing student group Turning Point USA gave ‘Adult VIP’ status to porn star Brandi Love to attend their conference, then revoked it amidst mounting pressure from conservatives. Love was there to promote her latest video, ‘Mounting Pressure’.

Three people reportedly died of carbon monoxide poisoning inside a trailer at a country music festival in Michigan. Country singers plan to memorialize the victims, just as soon as they can find a word that rhymes with ‘monoxide’.

Megan Thee Stallion is the first rapper to appear on the cover of Sports Illustrated‘s swimsuit issue. The decision was announced once the magazine found a way to make the cover an inch wider.

Ticket sales for Marvel’s ‘Black Widow’ dropped 67% in its second week, as theater owners complained that home rentals on Disney+ hurt attendance, and that they’ll have to store $10 buckets of popcorn until Xmas movie season.

New research suggests cognitively stimulating activities can delay Alzheimer’s symptoms by up to five years. As a result, researchers suggest watching Jeopardy! instead of Wheel Of Fortune.

CNN announced the launch of streaming service CNN+, so people can now angrily shut off computers & streaming devices in addition to cable boxes.

A fisherman caught and photographed a rare blue lobster, then tossed it back in the ocean so that it can hopefully get laid.

The Tokyo Olympic Village furnished athletes quarters with cardboard beds, supposedly to discourage sex. There are questions as to whether or not they’ll work, since some athletes are complaining their room smells like sweat and wet cardboard.

Disney Parks unveiled changes to its Jungle Cruise ride to eliminate racist cultural depictions. They say if visitors still want to see & hear racism, they can listen to the Trump robot in the Hall Of Presidents.