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BTS singer Jung Kook performed his single ‘Standing Next To You’ on The Tonight Show. For those unfamiliar with Korean boy band BTS, Jung Kook translates to ‘Harry Styles’ in English. .

Journalists in attendance for Donald Trump’s testimony at his New York financial fraud trial stated that Trump “lost it” on the witness stand – criticizing the judge, the attorney general, and whoever brought in Wendy’s instead of McDonald’s for lunch.

Actress Megan Fox released a book of poems entitled ‘Pretty Boys Are Poisonous‘. Titles of the poems include ‘“rape,” “funerals are for lovers,” “why i wish i was gay,” and “to marry an arsonist”. In other news Megan Fox’s read-along at the Children’s Library of Los Angeles has been postponed.

Lindsay Lohan, Lacey Chabert & Amanda Seyfried reprised their ‘Mean Girls‘ roles in a new ad campaign for Walmart’s Black Friday sales. Suburban moms get their own chance to be Mean Girls as they trample other women when stores open at 5 a.m. on November 24th.

Deanes EIPIC, a Michelin-starred restaurant in Belfast, Northern Ireland, closed due to rising operating costs, higher menu prices, and customers refusal to order anything but corned beef & cabbage.

Packs of javelinas – pig-like creatures with sharp teeth – are destroying Arizona’s Seven Canyons golf course as they tear up fairways looking for food. It’s illegal to kill javelinas in Arizona, so groundskeepers can only hope they leave, or choke to death on Titleists.

Baskin-Robbins introduced ‘Turkey Day Fixins’ ice cream as its Flavor of the Month. It has no turkey flavoring, but features notes of honey cornbread, cranberrry & sweet potato. After poor consumer testing, Dairy Queen cancelled its Green Bean Casserole Blizzard.

The Crazy Horse 3 strip club in Las Vegas is offering one free lap dance to current & former military personnel on Veterans Day. Extra dancers are being brought in to grind on Privates, Sergeants, etc.

A viral video shows a commercial jet flying over Israel while, in nearby airspace, Israeli’s Iron Dome defense missiles exploded Hamas rockets. Passengers aboard Spirit Airlines new service to Tel Aviv were each charged $10 for the light show.

Pauly Shore proposed to Drew Barrymore on Friday’s episode of The Drew Barrymore Show. The proposal question was unanswered – but at least we know if Barrymore could still attract A-List stars to the show after her Writers Strike controversy.

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In a viral Tik Tok video, a popular fitness influencer admitted she doesn’t wash her vibrator after every use. She assumed it just shook off the bacteria.

Tyson Foods recalled over 30,000 pounds of dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets because they allegedly contain metal. Although some parents were happy the brontosaurus their kid ate gave them plenty of iron.

Senior centers in Japan are getting Nintendo Switch consoles so residents can spend time playing video games – leading to a wave of seppuku over the dishonor of finishing last in Mario Kart.

Donald Trump is expected to appear and testify in his $250 million fraud trial – the first defendant ever to take the witness stand with the help of a teleprompter.

Guests at Disney World are reportedly letting children poop on the ground while waiting in long lines for popular rides like Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance, because they’re overwhelmed by the power of the force.

Khloe Kardashian is accused of a ‘Photoshop fail’ in a birthday photo tribute post to her mom, Kris Jenner – she forgot to edit out her brother Rob.

A Florida child called 911 because he wanted a hug. The responding officer hugged him, but shot him first just to be safe.

James Winburn, stunt double for Michael Myers in the original ‘Halloween‘ film, died at age 85. Although when the coroner arrived, his body was missing. [Ed.: This story is from 2022 but I just saw it.]

The Simpsons producers say they’ll no longer show Homer choking Bart. If you want to watch poor parenting for entertainment purposes, they advise watching The Kardashians.

New Jersey political boss George Norcross was kicked out of a suite at Sunday’s Philadelphia Eagles game for hanging a pro-Israel flag, and refusing to remove it, or write Fly Eagles Fly or Go Birds on it.