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The Uvalde, Texas high school football team won its first game of the season. Fired Sheriff Pete Arredondo waited outside the stadium for 80 minutes deciding if he wanted to go in.

A new fashion trend, ‘dolphin skin’, has emerged on social media, to describe a glistening, hydrated, fresh-out-of-the water look. It’s led to a more troubling trend of people sharing pics of the dolphin skin around their blowhole.

Fans of HBO’s Game of Thrones spinoff House of The Dragon are angry that the new show uses the same Game of Thrones opening theme song. Producers say they were forced to do so after they requested, and were refused, permission to use the theme to Facts Of Life.

Actor Charlie Sheen settled a lawsuit from an ex who claimed he knowingly exposed her to HIV in 2015. Sheen is paying $120,000 to settle the claim of HIV exposure – and $10,000 each for herpes, syphilis & chlamydia.

Jennifer Lopez is angry that a video of her singing to Ben Affleck at their wedding reception was leaked to the press, because all guests signed non-disclosure agreements. She’s even angrier that someone else leaked that the reception had a cash bar.

NASA postponed the launch of its new moon rocket due to a fuel leak and another engine problem. The launch will take place Friday at the earliest, according to the guy who ordered the fuel gasket at Auto Zone.

It’s the first day of school in the City of Philadelphia. Facebook & Instagram have already taken down hundreds of Back-To-School pictures of K-6th grade children holding guns.

Flight attendants reportedly broke up a fistfight between the pilot and co-pilot of an Air France flight from Geneva to Paris while the jet was in midair. The flight landed safely, and none of the weak punches did.

To commemorate National Cinema Day on September 3rd, theater chains will offer tickets for $3 to see one of the 3 movies actually showing in cinemas.

Poe, the Baltimore Ravens mascot, was carted off the field after injuring his leg during a halftime Mascots v Youth Footballer game. Asked if he’ll play in future games, the Raven said “nevermore”.

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Actor Dennis Quaid, 65, confirmed he’s engaged to 26-year-old Laura Savoie. Savoie had previously dated Jeremy Piven right up until she watched Piven’s stand-up comedy act.

  • Actor Randy Quaid announced his engagement to a 21-year-old black bear he met while hiking in the woods.

TMZ reports actress Lori Loughlin is more likely to take a plea deal in her college admissions trial. She’s reportedly scared by Felicity Huffman’s 14-day prison sentence, and more scared of wearing that green prison suit Huffman was photographed in.

A St. Louis high school cancelled the remainder of their undefeated football season after finding out the coach suited up a suspended player with a new number and identity. The player was identified by his tattoos, and by the funny nose/moustache/glasses he wore.

Amazon’s Jeff Bezos visited a Washington D.C. school. One student asked “Who’s Jeff Bezos?” The teacher replied, “ask your Dad, Barron.”

The cast of ‘Facts of Life’ – Tootie, Blair, Natalie & Jo – will reunite for a Lifetime Holiday movie, “Facts of Menopause Christmas”.

Google Maps will now allow drivers to report slowdowns, police speed traps, and road hazards – like the rear-end collisions they experience while staring at their phone reporting slowdowns and police speed traps.

Miley Cyrus defended her “you don’t have to be gay” comment about distrusting men, reaffirming her belief that being gay is not a choice, and her prioritization of the LGBTQ community that she is a part of when she feels like it.

A meth addict living in a suburban Philadelphia halfway house ordered uranium because he thought it would be cool to pose with it and share a photo on social media. He’s now being treated for smoking uranium.

A National Bureau of Economic Research study finds 60 percent of Uber riders don’t tip, and women tip less than men, possibly because they’re terrified.

Under Armour founder Kevin Plank is resigning as CEO amidst the company’s loss in market share, and as he struggles to explain why they’re still called Under Armour even though most of their stuff is worn on the outside.