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Netflix is planning to open ‘Netflix House’ brick & mortar locations, to create “everyday experiences for their most watched programming”. They’ll contain a theater, food, and a Netflix & Chill room that guys can rent for $200 an hour.

The Pittsburgh Penguins announced that their Jaromir Jagr Bobblehead giveaway night is postponed because they were all stolen in transit. Collectors who bought tickets are shaking their heads.

IKEA announced they’re aggressively cutting prices on hundreds of items. They want to help relieve the stress on budgets, and put the stress on relationships when men & women team up to put the furniture together.

Vice President Kamala Harris will visit an abortion clinic in Minnesota, but has already gotten unanimous ‘no’s from patients when Harris’ reps ask if they want to take a photo with her.

Apparel maker Fanatics is being dragged for its Major League Baseball uniform pants, now being made from synthetic so sheer that they’re being called see-through. Ball girls wearing the pants in MLB parks are giving foul balls to kids, and their dads are tucking dollar bills in the girls’ waistbands.

A new study finds cardiovascular and isometric exercises to be the best for reducing blood pressure. Doing them somewhere far away from your family lowers blood pressure even further.

Adidas posted a significant multimillion dollar quarterly loss as it liquidates inventory of Yeezy shoes in the wake of parting with Kanye West over his antisemitism. Betting big on a new shoe line with MC Hammer didn’t help the bottom line, either.

Independent candidate for president Robert F. Kennedy Jr is considering making New York Jets quarterback Aaron Rodgers his running mate. Rodgers will likely pass.

A Kellogg’s shareholder claims Froot Loops cereal is still being made with ‘harmful dyes’ despite the company’s claim that they’re removing them. The shareholder then produced a photo of spokesbird Toucan Sam who’s lost most of his feathers to cancer.

A Florida woman was arrested outside of an H&R Block attempting to sell her child for $500. She was arrested, but is waiting on the “maybes” from customers who didn’t know if they were getting a tax refund.

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Mercedes-Benz added turquoise blue lights to their cars to indicate when they’re in self-driving mode. Several German pedestrians remain in critical condition from hit & run accidents after being struck by vehicles they describe as having turquoise blue lights.

Philadelphia Police Academy graduated 31 new cadets to join the force. They each received a reloadable handgun and a reloadable Dunkin gift card.

A judge ruled that a list naming 180 of Jeffrey Epstein’s associates will be revealed as part of a settled lawsuit. Bill Clinton and Donald Trump already asked the judge if the female associates on the list come with phone numbers.

Portland International Airport debuted therapy llamas to calm passengers before their flights during the busy holiday season. Meanwhile, Spirit Airlines debuted wolverines at their departure gates to get passengers worked up for entertaining in-flight fights.

The “humblest Christmas tree in the world” – a 31-inch artificial tree dating back to the 1920s – sold at auction for over $4,000. The buyer and their spouse then fought for three hours over decorating it with colored or white lights.

New York Giants third-string quarterback Tommy DeVito appeared for free to sign autographs at a New Jersey pizzeria, after his original appearance was cancelled when his agent doubled his fee to $20,000. DeVito spent time with the owner, and filled out an application to deliver pizzas once the Giants other QBs get healthy.

Comcast/Xfinity revealed a data breach resulting in hackers stealing personal information of over 36 million customers. Comcast then notified customers of a ten percent price increase on cable tv & broadband to pay for security upgrades.

Sag Harbor, New York fired the man hired to portray Santa Claus at a village holiday celebration because he’d challenged Jewish speakers at a public forum discussing the Israel/Hamas war. Sag Harbor children just want the release of toys currently held captive at the North Pole.

Minnesota redesigned its state flag. Critics say the old flag, showing a Native American on horseback, depicted the state’s wrongful displacement of indigenous people. The new flag more respectfully shows a Native American pit boss supervising a casino.

China’s Guangdong Paper Company announced a new bonus plan, where they pay workers an annual bonus equal to a month’s salary if they walk or run 31 miles per month. The workers say it’s a novel way to stay fit, and they appreciate the extra five bucks.

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White House advisor Kellyanne Conway appeared on CBS’ ‘Face the Nation’ and said that the press is not the enemy of the people, adding that, in her case, mirrors are.

Taylor Hamlin, 18, was stripped of her crown as Maine Sea Goddess at the Maine Lobster Festival, after photos were found of her smoking what appears to be a marijuana cigarette and a Juul vaping device. She has been asked to surrender her crown, bib, claw-cracker, and chalice of lemon butter.

According to CDC data, the number of Americans sickened by eating McDonald’s salads has grown to 395 – or about one one-millionth of the number of people sickened by the idea of eating McDonald’s salads.

MoviePass will now limit members to seeing just three movies a month for $9.95.  However, the company is reportedly considering a plan to allow pass holders to add one movie each month for every $10 bucket of stale popcorn they buy.

Jingjing Hu, a music student at DePaul University, was booted off of an American Airlines flight from Miami to Chicago along with her cello, for which she’d purchased a ticket to occupy the seat next to her. American said there was a miscommunication about its policy; adding that the cello refused to assist passengers in an emergency since it was in an exit row.

In Camden, New Jersey, three formal postal workers were sentenced for their roles in a scheme to cash $100,000 in stolen postal money orders. The scheme ran aground when the men had trouble finding anyone under age 70 who knew what a postal money order is.

Verizon announced it’s bringing 5G Wireless technology to Houston, Texas. 5G, hailed as the “next generation” of internet speed, means Houston-area creeps will get an answer to ‘U Up?’ texts in just fractions of a second.

Online information service PrepScholar compiled College Board data to identify the states with the highest and lowest SAT scores. The highest overall scores were from students in Minnesota; the lowest overall scores were from the District of Columbia, where the test is known as the STA.

A recall was issued for Vanilla Almond Breeze almond milk because it may contain traces of real milk — the makers said they’ll improve screening to stop using pregnant almonds.

Emma Watkins and Lachlan Gillespie, a married couple who are both in children’s music group The Wiggles, have announced they’re getting a divorce. The announcement confirms rumors from five-year-old fans who noticed the group’s music getting much darker with the release of their new single “Cheating Isn’t Nice.”

 

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A Russian research team unearthed the fossilized remains of a 10-ton, 17-foot-long sea cow on a Siberian beach. Experts believe the sea cow wanted to spend time at the beach, but needed to go to Siberia to avoid crowds & body-shaming.

Thanksgiving night fights forced officials to shut down the Riverchase Galleria Mall in Birmingham, Alabama, as fathers of teenage girls sought to protect them from Roy Moore.

GOBankingRates released a list of the 15 most affordable states for Millennials to buy homes. Topping the list? West Virginia – where it’s estimated that a home can be bought after just two-and-a-half years of selling meth.

DamToys is selling a 12-inch Steve Jobs figurine for nearly $200. It berates other nearby action figures and comes with 10 accessories, none of which is a daughter that the figurine refuses to acknowledge.

President Trump tweeted on Friday that he was heading to Trump National Golf Club to “play golf (quickly) with Tiger Woods and Dustin Johnson.” ‘Quickly’ means he’ll quit when they won’t let him win.

A Swedish power plant near Stockholm that uses recycled materials as fuel is burning unsold clothing from fast-fashion chain H&M; the company that owns the plant is hiring hundreds of mean girls to follow classmates around telling them to ‘burn that outfit’.

Following a second accuser’s claim that he grabbed her buttocks during a photo at the Minnesota State Fair, Senator Al Franken issued a new apology, and verified that he’s banned from the livestock exhibit at this year’s fair.

Oprah Winfrey shared her lavish Thanksgiving dinner spread on Instagram, including four 22-pound turkeys for her and her guests. Winfrey, a Weight Watchers spokesperson, declined to say how many Weight Watchers points she consumed, but was photographed with her food diary and a scientific calculator.

Michael Flynn is no longer sharing information regarding the Russia investigation with President Trump’s lawyers, leading observers to believe Special Investigator Robert Mueller has “flipped” Mueller to testify against The President. Sensing an opportunity, Russian President Vladimir Putin has offered to let Flynn use his Safe House.

Duchess Kate Middleton – pregnant with her third child – went off-roading with her husband, Prince William, at the Jaguar/Land Rover factory in England. “Off-roading” in this case meaning using Parent With Toddler parking instead of valet.